About a week into our kitten Norton’s life at our house, we noticed that he was suckling himself, using one of his own nipples. He’d go at it in a really focused way, and knead his paws at the same time, purring loudly. Having no experience with this, we took him to the vet, who reassured us that the behavior was nothing to worry about. She noted that the nipple was not inflamed or infected. The vet said that kittens may outgrow this kitten suckling behavior, and that sometimes kitten suckling happens when a kitten has been orphaned too young. The latter had been something I wondered about.

Still, I wanted to find out more. Would this kitten suckling behavior go away? Did it mean he was stressed or just contented? If I distracted him, would he stop? (When Norton suckles, which now seems to be occurring less and less, nothing can distract him.)

Kitten suckling — what is it?

Kitten suckling can occur when cats suck on their nipples, other areas of skin and other objects. Cats might suckle on rugs, your skin tags, your ears or your fingers. Jamie Bluebell came to us as a kitten and for a very brief time, she would suckle on a skin tag on my husband’s armpit. She also liked to suck on the frames of his glasses. But Jamie got over it fairly quickly, and from what we know, we think that Jamie was not orphaned as young as Norton.

The causes of cat or kitten suckling

The causes of kitten suckling can include being separated from mom too early. Ideally, kittens should not be weaned from mom earlier than six weeks. But according to ASPCA information online, cat or kitten suckling can also be a sign of stress, compulsive behavior, or even just happiness or contentment. It’s a hard behavior to nail down.

Is kitten suckling bad for kitties?

Sometimes kittens suckling is harmless. But sometimes, according to this Catster article, cats or kittens can do damage to each other or themselves if they suckle too hard or for too long. The article refers to what is probably a high-stress situation — kittens in a Humane Society who are motherless and suckling each other to the point of damage.

Should you do anything about kitten suckling?

My vet proposed no solution. She saw no reason to be concerned in Norton’s case.

If you’re not concerned about suckling and your cat continues, you can try to make the situation a little safer. For example, if your cat loves to suckle blankets, make sure that the blanket fabric doesn’t pill or have loose threads that your cat could swallow.

Obviously, trying to physically stop your cat from suckling (in the moment) or yelling at your cat when he’s suckling are not good solutions. If your cat is suckling from stress, this will only stress him more.

Here’s what I’m going to do about kitten suckling

Most of what I’ve read (and observed at home) say to me that kitten suckling is not a bad thing. It seems that Norton is getting comfort, and he’s not acting like he’s doing it from stress. The site is not infected, as my vet pointed out, and we’re keeping an eye on that. The frequency of suckling gradually seems to be diminishing. And if we’re playing with Norton, or snuggling, suckling seems to be far from his mind. So I’ll wait it out, and see what happens. In my situation, I’m not worried. Norton seems happy and not stressed or compulsive.

In short — and the ASPCA article worded this helpfully — if the kitten suckling is interfering with your cat’s quality of life, then it’s time to seek help. If your cat is damaging his skin, or the skin of another, or seems to be suckling as a kind of stress response, seek help. Get the help of a certified cat behaviorist or your veterinarian.

Read more on similar cat behaviors on Catster.com:

• Cats Making Biscuits: All About Cat Kneading
• Reasons Why Cats Suck on Blankets or Clothing
• Fun Reasons for Cat Kneading

Featured Image Credit: ElenaBoronina, Shutterstock

The post Kitten Suckling: Behavior Facts & FAQ by Catherine Holm appeared first on Catster. Copying over entire articles infringes on copyright laws. You may not be aware of it, but all of these articles were assigned, contracted and paid for, so they aren't considered public domain. However, we appreciate that you like the article and would love it if you continued sharing just the first paragraph of an article, then linking out to the rest of the piece on Catster.com.

Is your cat sleeping in your bed with you? I’ve experienced all sides of sleeping with cats. When I was single, I had cats. They got to share the bed and it was no big deal. They loved it, and it made me happy to see them happy.

But things changed a little when two humans started sleeping in the bed. We let the cats join us at first, but with a full-size bed — and cats who either didn’t move at all or moved in ways to wake us up — we discovered that the quality of our sleep had gone down the drain. I love my sleep, and I was forced to reconsider the issues of cats sleeping in the bed.

Recently, I met a nice woman who does a lot of work in foster and cat rescue, and she seemed quite surprised that I shut the cats out of the bedroom. But I’ve learned that I really don’t function that well without good sleep. And how can I take care of my cats if I’m not functioning at my best? See — it always comes back to the cats.

Here are five things to consider if you’re thinking about sleeping with cats in your bed:

1. Are you getting any sleep with cats on your bed?

Is having the cat or cats on the bed worth sacrificing a full night of sleep? Only you can answer that! Some fortunate people need little or no sleep. I envy these people. Oh, the stuff I could get done if I didn’t need eight hours of sleep time.

2. Does sleeping with cats interrupt your sleep?

Is your lovely, deep, REM sleep interrupted suddenly when your sleeping cat decides to jump on your face? Does the tender pat pat or scratch scratch of a gentle paw wake you up earlier than usual? But more important, does it bother you? If not, great! If I could go without sleep, I would surely and generously share the bed with my cats.

3. Are the cats happy sleeping in your bed?

If sleep doesn’t matter, or if you sleep so deeply that no cat could wake you up, consider whether bedtime privileges make your cat deliriously happy and add to his quality of life. Maybe that sounds over the top, but honestly, I’ve had cats that light up for hours after getting coveted time on the bed with us. Note that in our household, bedtime with people in the bed seems to be much more special than time napping on a bed devoid of humans.

4. Does one cat need special attention?

I have used the bed, on occasion, to give a cat needed attention in certain situations. For example, if one cat is really tired out with the arrival of a new kitten, I might give that adult cat a break from the kitten by allowing the adult some night time bed time, even if I know that adult (a certain black cat comes to mind) is going to get very lovey at about four in the morning with the intention to wake me up. When my buff cat Chester was grieving the loss of his buddy, I gave Chester lots of bed time. He needed the extra attention. I’m not completely rigid about keeping cats out of the bed when we are sleeping!

5. Do your cats turn into concrete bricks on the bed?

How does one small cat turn into a concrete brick? It’s one of the magic tricks that cats pull. If you cannot sleep because you run into a feline brick every time you toss and turn, well, the cat might have to get off the bed. Some cats have also perfected the art of being fluid concrete bricks, as they drape themselves over your sleeping body and refuse to move.

6. Do the cats make a fuss at the closed bedroom door, making more noise than they would on the bed?

If you have clever cats who have figured out how to make noise on the other side of the bedroom door, letting the cats on the bed might be the lesser of two evils. You decide!

Tell us: What do you think about sleeping with cats? Do you sleep with your cats? Does it make the quality of your sleep better or worse, or does it matter? Does your cat love bedtime privileges? Share your stories in comments!

Thumbnail: Photography ©Aksenovko | Thinkstock.

About Catherine Holm: Told that she is funny but doesn’t know it, accused of being an unintentional con artist by her husband, quiet, with frequent unannounced bursts into dancing liveliness, Cat Holm loves writing about, working for, and living with cats. She is the author of the cat-themed memoir Driving with Cats: Ours for a Short Time, the creator of Ann Catanzaro cat fantasy story gift books, and the author of two short story collections. She loves to dance, be outside whenever possible, read, play with cats, make music, do and teach yoga, and write. Cat lives in the woods, which she loves as much as really dark chocolate, and gets regular inspiration shots along with her double espresso shots from the city.

Read more about cats and sleep on Catster.com:

• Is Your Cat Sleeping Too Much — or Not Enough?
• 5 Reasons Your Cat Wakes You Up at the Same Time Every Day Without Fail
• Video: Do Cats Dream — And If So, What Do They Dream About?

The post Should I Let My Cat Sleep With Me? Pros, Cons & Verdict by Catherine Holm appeared first on Catster. Copying over entire articles infringes on copyright laws. You may not be aware of it, but all of these articles were assigned, contracted and paid for, so they aren't considered public domain. However, we appreciate that you like the article and would love it if you continued sharing just the first paragraph of an article, then linking out to the rest of the piece on Catster.com.

Although some debate if cats even need other cats, I’m in the process of slowly integrating my formerly feral Zorro into the rest of the clowder, and I’m trying to keep everybody happy. It’s my nature to want to keep everything in harmony, so that’s not a stretch for me. But sometimes my cats have ideas of their own. Introducing cats is different every time. These introductions vary depending upon the personalities of the cats involved and the physical environment I have to work with, among other things. Currently, Zorro is being introduced into a family of five other cats. Here’s what I’m trying:

1. Use the available space to your advantage when introducing cats

I have more space to work with for this introduction than I’ve had in the past. This is great because it means that possibly disgruntled cats (disgruntled about the newcomer) can spread out and occupy themselves. The newcomer doesn’t have to be in their face all the time, even if the newbie is behind a door. It’s great for cats to feel as if they have lots of escape possibilities and hiding places. If you can provide this, great. If you need to create escape places that will feel good for your new cat, consider the use of cat carriers.

2. I make sure that all cats get equal attention — and that the mainstays perhaps get a little more

I sometimes get so enamored with a newcomer (and Zorro is adorable, most would admit) that time can get thin and the attention given to others can be neglected. So I need to be really aware of that. Make sure that all your cats are getting lots of attention during this transition. You might really lay on the attention to the cats who are the most settled and have been around the longest. They’ve weathered a lot of change and they deserve our loyalty. Make a note to make sure that everyone gets attention, every day.

3. I’m creative with the cat introductions

Introducing cats is always a little different. In this case, I am learning that Zorro is extremely loving, calm, and not too aggressive (he does have the Ragdoll personality tendency), but with a bit of playfulness. (Zorro’s temporary home until he is completely introduced is in a second-floor loft, and I can hear him playing with his toys — hard— during the night.)

Given Zorro’s personality, I decided to introduce him first to Norton. Norton is young and easygoing, and doesn’t seem to hold a grudge. This also seems to keep everyone else happy, for now. And it also keeps Norton busy, because his energy is sometimes a bit much for the older cats.

What I’ve done is to take this introduction in increments. I first brought Norton into Zorro’s room with Norton enclosed in a carrier. I also knew that Zorro was starting to get lonely, so I thought the distraction would be good for both of them. I think if you choose right, everyone can benefit. In this case, Zorro got some company, Norton got a new experience to keep him busy, the rest get a break from Norton. (Zorro’s energy level probably most matches Norton’s, of all the cats.)

Gradually, as these two cats got used to each other, I began to let Norton out of the carrier in the room. Zorro was delighted, running up to rub against Norton. Norton grumbled a little, but Norton is not a seriously grumpy cat. Everyone else was happily napping downstairs, unconcerned with the introduction upstairs. I am hoping that subsequent intros will be even easier now that Norton has broken the ice.

4. Try to make introducing cats a fun thing

Rather than getting stressed about a new cat introduction, I try to make it fun. Playing seems to be the great equalizer. In this case, there’s a nice gap under the door to Zorro’s room. Now that Norton has gotten to know Zorro, I’ve seen them play paws under the door without growling or aggression. Again, it frees up the other cats to go about their business.

This particular door also has a semitransparent cat door installed in the door. I locked the cat door, but the cats can “see” each other through the opaque plastic. This is another way to keep everyone busy and happy.

If Zorro is lonely, I’ll play with him. I feel at this point, he’ll be with all the others, soon. If the others seem down, or disgruntled about the change, I’ll play with them, too.

Tell us: What are your hints for introducing cats? Share your ideas in the comments!

Thumbnail: Photography by By Okssi | Shutterstock. 

Read more about introducing cats on Catster.com:

• How to Introduce a Cat to a Baby and Prepare Your Cat for the Change
• Do Cats Need Other Cats or Would They Rather Be Alone?
• How Long After Your Cat Dies Should You Wait Before Getting a New Cat?

The post What to Know When Introducing Cats to a New Cat by Catherine Holm appeared first on Catster. Copying over entire articles infringes on copyright laws. You may not be aware of it, but all of these articles were assigned, contracted and paid for, so they aren't considered public domain. However, we appreciate that you like the article and would love it if you continued sharing just the first paragraph of an article, then linking out to the rest of the piece on Catster.com.

Losing a cat is excruciating. In fact, I’m going through it and grieving as I write this. I think the loss of a pet and the grief process that follows is one of the hardest, most intense experiences we have to get through.

It’s not easy to prepare for grief, as each end-of-life journey is different. That being said, I’ve been through this a few times and have discovered that I do certain things to help me cope with losing a cat. Hopefully, some of these suggestions can help you navigate the grief process after the loss of a pet.

The 7 Tips For Helping Grief

1. I celebrate the cat’s (whole) life

At the end of life, whether it’s prolonged or sudden, it’s easy to get caught up in the sadness and intensity of that current moment. Sometimes, when I’ve found myself in this place, I realize I’m not honoring the rest of the cat’s life. What about the amazing years or months I had with the cat? What about the funny things my cat did? Or the loving bond we had? What about the wonderful memories and stories of the cat? I try to focus on the life I’ve shared with the cat, even though it’s very easy to want to focus totally on the end of life.

2. I find people who understand what losing a cat is like

Whether your cat has passed on or is likely to pass on soon, obviously you’ll want to be around people who understand. Now is not the time to take comments like “it’s only a cat” to heart. If you do run across someone who says something like this, try to breathe and let it go. You need your energy to get through grieving, not to get mad about ill-placed comments.

Instead, find people who understand and are respectful of your loss of a pet and the grief process, whether they love cats or not. A compassionate person and friend will give you the space and respect your need to grieve.

3. I take time to be alone, if I need it

Some of us like to share; others are intensely vulnerable when going through grief. I’m a little of both. Know yourself. If you need to be alone, honor that. It’s OK.

4. I understand that loss of a pet and grief is a powerful process

Sometimes, grief reminds me of the waves of an ocean. You’re feeling fine and then WHAM, some piece of grief hits you and you’re down, or crying, or both. I’m not sure why it is, but just knowing that this happens has made me prepared for when it happens again. I try to flow with it. Everyone grieves differently. We all grieve in our own time, and in our own way. Let it happen the way it needs to happen for you.

5. I breathe (deeply)

This is a yoga tool, but it’s also a relaxation technique, which anyone can do. When you’re exhausted from stress or grieving, breathing deeply through your nose can really help relax you and restore your mind and body to a state of calmness. Even a minute or two of this has great benefits. I do this all the time during periods of stress, or if I’m grieiving the loss of a pet. From a physiological standpoint, this activates your parasympathetic nervous system (which induces relaxation) rather than your sympathetic nervous system (which is all about fight or flight). Try breathing deeply in any stressful situation or any time you find yourself holding your breath.

6. I’m good to myself and my body

I’m no good to my cats if I’m a mess. So even though it’s hard (grief is exhausting), I try to remember to be good to my body. I try to remember to eat good stuff (not junk), get outside, exercise, breathe — all good things for me. Find the good things for you and remember to do them.

7. I honor the immensity of grief

It’s a big deal, and we all get to go through it. The sadness in grief is huge, but strangely, so is the joy. Celebrate these wonderful creatures we love, whether we’re going through life with them or whether we’re letting them go.

Read more about losing a cat and handling grief:

• Nine Signs of Grief in Cats
• 5 Ways to Help a Cat Grieve the Loss of a Feline Friend
• Behind My Cat Tattoo: How I Transformed Grief into Art
• On Grief, “The Gambler,” and My Cat, Rufus (2000-2012)

Featured Image Credit: Yaya Photos, Shutterstock

The post How To Cope With Losing a Cat: 7 Tips For Helping Grief by Catherine Holm appeared first on Catster. Copying over entire articles infringes on copyright laws. You may not be aware of it, but all of these articles were assigned, contracted and paid for, so they aren't considered public domain. However, we appreciate that you like the article and would love it if you continued sharing just the first paragraph of an article, then linking out to the rest of the piece on Catster.com.

I get to observe my cats a lot, and how they space themselves around each other. Some will cuddle, but other pairings never happen. Among six cats, the variations can get pretty interesting in terms of personal space. It’s a good thing I enjoy observing the cats so much.

Here are a few of the variations that occur in my household.

How Much Space Does Your Cat Need?

Rama (a big black male cat) has always kept to himself. He loves my undivided attention, but he clearly gets jealous if another cat is nearby when he is getting his special attention. He’ll vocally make his displeasure known, and he might lash out with a paw toward some of the cats with whom he’s a little less patient. Zorro is one of my cats with whom few of the others display any patience.

Rama generally has napped by himself. Years ago, he would sometimes be joined by Chester (an orange boy) or Keiran (a Turkish Van). Rama didn’t seem to mind these two so close to him, but he never groomed them, and they never groomed him. Then, many years passed where Rama essentially napped alone, always.

Then Norton entered the picture. Norton is an easygoing, fun-loving, physical boy, and the youngest of the bunch. Lately I’ve been pleased to see Norton often sleeping with Rama. I even saw them grooming each other the other day. You have to be a cat parent to appreciate the special quality of this moment, especially with a traditionally snarky cat like Rama. Rama even plays and wrestles with Norton now — this is huge progress, as Rama is a very serious (and somewhat insecure) cat and has never played much with any other cat in the household.

These instances have always fascinated me. Why do these things change over time, sometimes? Why do they sometimes never change? Does it take the perfect combination of cats for something to happen?

Zorro and Chester

These are two very easygoing cats, but for some reason, Chester has suddenly decided that he cannot tolerate Zorro getting too close to him. There seems to be no predictability as to when things may or may not escalate. Chester has always gotten along with everyone. He had no problem with Zorro for the first year and a half of Zorro’s time in this household. And sometimes they’re near each other — napping, hanging out, whatever — and things are just fine. But other times, with no warning, Chester will suddenly start to stare down Zorro. Sometimes he corners Zorro, and a scuffle ensues. There’s no guessing when this will happen. Keeping the Feliway diffusers full does not seem to alleviate this. It either happens, or it doesn’t.

Strangely, it does finally seem to be subsiding (I hope). I’ve not heard any scuffles for several days. But I’m not sure what triggers this. Why can a cat sometimes tolerate another cat nearby, yet become ballistic on other occasions?

An expert gives input

Amy Shojai, certified animal behavior consultant for cats and dogs, and award-winning author, confirms what I’ve noticed. She says that every cat is an individual, and “just like people, attitude may vary from day to day.” Amy says that in feral cat populations, normal territorial range might be more than two miles, “so when we truncate the cat’s territory by confining him/her to a house or apartment, many cats get their tails in a twist.”

Whether cats are able to share resources might depend on factors such as value of and access to the resource (treats/food, sleeping spots, lookouts, or humans). I know that Rama, who is very food oriented, doesn’t want any cat near him when he gets a treat. As I suspected, a cat’s tolerance regarding personal space, according to Amy, also has to do with how confident or insecure the cat might be.

“Age influences c’attitude,” she says. “And so does weather. Cloudy days and colder weather seem to prompt some cats to be more accepting of sharing beds — maybe for the warmth.”

So, cats are unique individuals, but they can change over time. A lot of variables enter into this, and for those of us with multicat households, it can make for some fascinating observations.

Do some of your cats need a lot of personal space? Do others not? Does this vary? What patterns have you noticed, if any?

The post How Much Space Does A Cat Need? by Catherine Holm appeared first on Catster. Copying over entire articles infringes on copyright laws. You may not be aware of it, but all of these articles were assigned, contracted and paid for, so they aren't considered public domain. However, we appreciate that you like the article and would love it if you continued sharing just the first paragraph of an article, then linking out to the rest of the piece on Catster.com.

We and our cats have a three-pronged relationship with our vets, and each of us might have a different perspective when we come together. But we share a common goal with our vets — health and happiness for our beloved cats. Because our cats can’t verbally tell us what’s wrong, we must make the most of our time with the vet.

How can we represent our cats in the most complete way? How can we pick up on things we might see as commonplace but that might be great clues for vets? To add a professional perspective I spoke with my own vet, Dr. Sally Schlueter of East Haven Veterinary Service in Vermont (who I call “Dr. Sally”), on how we can best speak for our cat regardless of whether we’re in for a wellness/preventative appointment or what she calls an “ill” appointment (such as an emergency or an obvious illness).

Dr. Sally said that during wellness visits (because the stakes aren’t as high, in our eyes), we might forget or discard observations that could be important. It’s easy to get wrapped up in celebrating some cute thing our cat did, or talking about new toys, for example. There’s nothing wrong with this, but it pays to be observant and to gather information for any type of visit.

How to Be the Best Client and Cat Spokesperson at the Vet

1. Know exactly what your cat is eating

It seems we should know this, but I’ll admit at times I’ll grab the bag of grain free food I feed my cats, but I can’t for the life of me remember the name of it. It’s a good brand, I know that — but I simply look for the bag I recognize. But your vet needs to know what you’re feeding your cat. So make sure you have this information.

“Take a picture of the label,” suggested Dr. Sally, because all vets might not be familiar with the content of all the different types of food out there. “If you’re feeding your pet home-cooked food, list the exact ingredients and their measurements.”

In my experience, some vets are less interested in diet than others. But I’m interested in the effects of diet so have ended up with vets who share this view. There are obviously cases where your vet should ask about diet — in cases of certain illness, for example, but I hope more vets are recognizing the importance of nutrition, even as a preventative factor.

2. Keep a diary

Do you remember everything your cat does? I don’t. Plus, the demands of life can overfill our brains. Dr. Sally suggests you write down anything that matters and bring it to your vet visit. Do you notice unusual behavior, or something that just seems a little “off” about your cat?

“Write down every occurrence, when it happened, its frequency, and any additional information,” she said.

When a vet is concerned about something, she or he will often ask whether anything has changed recently in the household. So keep track of those occurrences, too. When did a new cat join the house, for example? Was there noisy construction in the house? Did another pet pass on? Nothing is too far-out or absurd — and it might help your vet see the bigger picture of what is going on with your cat.

3. Use another person’s observations

I’ve really appreciated the times my spouse has gone with me on vet visits. I get spacey and overloaded mentally when I am stressed, and if there’s a feline illness happening, I am usually stressed. It helps to have another household perspective to offer observations, Dr. Sally says. Do you have a spouse, partner, roommate, trusted cat-sitter, or friend who pays attention to your cat? Bring that person on the vet visit. If the person can’t join you, get  relevant information and bring it to the appointment.

4. Anticipate your vet’s questions

The longer I have cats, the more interactions I’ve had with vets. A good vet will ask good questions, but she or he can’t know everything you do. Try to anticipate the kinds of questions a vet will ask — and be ready with answers. Imagine the vet’s point of view. She or he will want to know everything you’ve seen (or heard, or smelled), when it occurred, how often, and why it might be a clue or a cause for concern. Nothing is too crazy, and it’s better to have too much information than too little. You and your vet can figure out what’s relevant after you’ve done your best to represent your cat.

More by Catherine Holm:

• Cat Bloggers Talk: Does Writing about Cats “Overexpose” You?
• Keep Your House Smelling Good Without Hurting Your Cats
• How to Give a Cat Pills — And Survive

Featured Image Credit: Ground Picture, Shutterstock

The post How to Be the Best Client and Cat Spokesperson at the Vet by Catherine Holm appeared first on Catster. Copying over entire articles infringes on copyright laws. You may not be aware of it, but all of these articles were assigned, contracted and paid for, so they aren't considered public domain. However, we appreciate that you like the article and would love it if you continued sharing just the first paragraph of an article, then linking out to the rest of the piece on Catster.com.

Having several cats gives me endless opportunities to observe the interactions between them. I almost always enjoy these interactions and what they teach me about these fascinating creatures. Usually, things between the cats have gone very smoothly.

When a new cat comes into the household, I introduce that cat as slowly as the situation calls for, even if it takes months. I’ll start by placing the cat in a separate room and proceed with a gradual introduction.

But even after a successful introduction, bullying can arise out of nowhere. When I first fully integrated Zorro with the rest of the cats, for example, it seemed that he was unsure of his place among the others. He’d bully Jamie Bluebell (the only girl of the six cats) and continually chase her into my office, her safe zone. It never turned into an all-out cat fight, but she was clearly stressed and felt most secure in the office, especially if I was there. She’d often sit behind me on my chair.

Thankfully, that dynamic has changed. The two cats have a much friendlier and teasing type of relationship. Their interaction slowly morphed from a slightly aggressive bullying dynamic to almost a flirting tease with an occasional bop in the face. At this point, Jamie often initiates the teasing, bopping Zorro in the face and running away. Zorro isn’t bothered and doesn’t react at all. They will sprawl next to each other, and she seems to look for opportunities to tease and engage him, though I’ve never seen them cuddle.

How to prevent bullying in cats:

Separate the cats

When Zorro was in the habit of chasing Jamie Bluebell, and when she seemed to be stressed by this, she gravitated to my office, where I spent a lot of time. So, I gave her the office and often shut Zorro out of it. I let her spend the night in the office alone, if Zorro was to be unsupervised.

Distract them with playing

If the bullying is not too intense — if it doesn’t resemble an all-out cat fight or the beginnings of one — I have redirected the cats’ attention by grabbing a toy once bullying begins. I have a theory that if I play with my cats enough, they might have less pent-up energy for scuffling and getting into situations that could turn aggressive.

Use products designed to calm cats

I used Feliway and Jackson Galaxy’s Bully Remedy. These helped manage and prevent aggressive situations in my household.

Provide hiding and escape places

We’re lucky in that we have a lot of space for the cats to be by themselves when needed. Mostly, they like to hang out together. The wood stove in the wintertime is a great cat unifier.

However, if your living space is small or has no place for cats to escape, create vertical space and provide options such as well-constructed and sturdy cat trees. According to Marilyn Krieger in her book Naughty No More!, the best cat trees have shelves that are not directly above each other and that allow cats to easily escape from the cat tree if needed.

Krieger also suggests noting if there is a pattern to when or where bullying or aggression occurs and working around that. If the bullying behavior is mild, separate the cats, but make sure that separation is not a punishment. Cats should have food, water, and litter provided where they are isolated. If the bullying behavior is more severe, Krieger suggests the cats might have to be slowly reintroduced, as if they were being introduced for the first time.

I asked wehther bullying behavior included a situation I’ve sometimes seen where one cat will jump another, and then a third cat will also jump that other cat. But Krieger pointed out this is not a good example of “copy cat” action, or what is called observational behavior.

“There are many reasons that cats will jump on top of each other — it might be status issues, it might be due to a health problem in the pariah cat, maybe a variety of stimuli or, it may be play,” Krieger said.

This reminded me that cat behavior can always mean a number of things, and that I have more to learn.

Have you experienced bullying behavior in your multi-cat household? What have you tried to stop or prevent it?

More by Catherine Holm:

• Cat Bloggers Talk: Does Writing about Cats “Overexpose” You?
• Keep Your House Smelling Good Without Hurting Your Cats
• How to Give a Cat Pills — And Survive

About Catherine Holm: Cat Holm is the author of The Great Purr, the cat-themed memoir Driving with Cats: Ours for a Short Time, and a contributor to Rescued: The Stories of 12 Cats, Through Their Eyes. She’s also a yoga instructor. Cat love living in nature and being outside every day, even in winter. She is mom to six adorable cats, all of them rescues.

Featured Image Credit: Vshivkova, Shutterstock

The post Bullying Arose Among My Cats — Here’s How I Ended It by Catherine Holm appeared first on Catster. Copying over entire articles infringes on copyright laws. You may not be aware of it, but all of these articles were assigned, contracted and paid for, so they aren't considered public domain. However, we appreciate that you like the article and would love it if you continued sharing just the first paragraph of an article, then linking out to the rest of the piece on Catster.com.

Recently, we got a new couch. We’d had used furniture for a long time, and in a way, it allowed me to get lax — I never worried much about whether the cats scratched the furniture because it was ancient anyway, and not the most beautiful pieces in the furniture universe. I got lucky — I didn’t have a lot of trouble, though Kali (now deceased) loved to scratch a particular corner of an ancient futon. We got a washable cover to place on it, which generally seemed to make the cats want to scratch less, and it made me forget about the previous scratching.

But when we spent a few hundred dollars on a new couch, I started thinking more about providing good scratching options for my cats. I believed that cats would be more tempted to scratch if the fabric on the couch had an obvious nap (a texture that had something for the cats to grab onto and dig claws into), so I chose a microfiber that was smooth.

The saleslady (a cat person) said that when she purchased new furniture, she placed the cat scratching post in a prominent place in the living room. Picture a room with a couch, and a coffee table in front of the couch. The cat scratching post would replace the coffee table.

The saleslady theorized that the cats liked being the center of attention in the room and they would head right to the scratching post and use it. I wondered whether the cats enjoyed being the center of attention or the cat scratching apparatus had simply been placed in an area that was easier for the cats to use. Regardless, we had a few days until the couch actually, so I took the saleslady’s advice. We had a small cat scratching post. I knew it was inadequate (not tall enough, not enough scratching area), though the cats did love the little tube area to play in. I ordered a taller and more sturdy scratching post. We set them both in the center of the room, right in front of the couch.

Did it work? Yes. The cats loved the addition of a sturdier and taller scratching post. At the same time, they still loved to play in the smaller version, and they scratch on it, too.

I believe they also like having the posts out in the open. It’s easier to approach them from any side. I believe that having these scratching opportunities out in the open also encourages the cats to really stretch out, use their bodies, and scratch. We have not seen them scratching the new furniture so far.

Cat expert Rita Reimers agreed with my findings, and she added this advice:

“Offer a variety of scratchers of different types that are available throughout the cat’s environment. Tucking all of them in corners or just offering one scratcher is setting you up for failure. Our cats want to be where we are, so set up scratchers in places where the cats can be with us, be it the living room, bedroom, or office.”

Reimers also sprays scratchers with catnip spray.

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The post Strategically Placed Scratching Posts Could Save Your Furniture by Catherine Holm appeared first on Catster. Copying over entire articles infringes on copyright laws. You may not be aware of it, but all of these articles were assigned, contracted and paid for, so they aren't considered public domain. However, we appreciate that you like the article and would love it if you continued sharing just the first paragraph of an article, then linking out to the rest of the piece on Catster.com.

I recently made a 1,400-mile trip to join my husband. Our cats really love it when the whole family is together, and they really missed Chris when he was gone. I had thought hard about whether to take the cats with me or to leave them at home with a new pet sitter. Here’s what went into my decision-making process. I posted a question about this on a private Facebook cat blog group. The answers were pretty evenly divided. In the end, I went without the cats.

There was a time when I would have said, “No way. It’s hard on the cats.” But with my bunch, I began to question whether they might do better with this long trip, because we’d all be together on the other end.

Here are some of the things I thought about.

The 6 Reasons to take the cats on vacation

• The cats had made this trip before without incident, when we moved from Minnesota to Vermont. Each cat had a carrier, and we also had a dog on the trip. I used Rescue Remedy and Feliway spray in the cars. To be honest, the cats did much better than the stressed-out humans. No one got sick and there were no accidents, with the exception of Norton accidentally pooping once in his cage. They basically slept calmly throughout and ate small- to medium-sized meals (canned food, to help with hydration) when we reached the motel each night.
• They ride well. I’ve been lucky to have cats who are pretty calm in the car. I try to stay calm, too, imagining that the cats probably pick up on my vibe. If I had a cat who totally freaked out in the car, then it would be an easy decision not to put the cat through the stress of a car ride.
• We could all be together when we joined my husband. I hate splitting up the family! I think the cats like it when we are all together as well. When one of us has to go away, the cats act a little unnerved and unsettled.
• They had a decent place to stay on the other end. I knew that they would be comfortable and have enough room to relax, move about, and look out windows on the other end of the trip.
• My vet really thought that they’d all be just fine on this trip (and she knows them well). I really respect my vet, who has a lot of common sense and intuition. She knows my cats. I was initially intimidated by the length of the trip (1,400 miles seems very different from a 30-minute ride to the vet!), but she reassured me that she thought my particular batch of cats would do just fine, and that the benefits of having the family together might really be a nice thing for all.
• In a very unscientific survey (i.e., I made several calls to motels along the way), it seems that more chains and independent motels are becoming open to allowing pets for the night. I was honest about the fact that I would be traveling with six cats, and the few establishments that I talked to hardly balked. Some charged a small additional pet fee or deposit ($10-30 total). But, it varies by establishment and ownership. It pays to check around if you will need to spend the night in a motel.

However, after I thought about it, I decided to leave the cats at home. I was only going for a week, and I wanted to see how it went. Here’s what I discovered.

The 4 Reasons to leave the cats at home

• The pet sitter turned out to be excellent. I was working with this pet sitter for the first time (she also happens to be a vet tech with my vet — lucky me!). I left it open as to how often she needed to stop by; I wanted to see how the cats did. As it turned out, she only had to come once a day — the cats were great! I felt in totally good hands with a person who understood cats and who had actually worked with my cats at the vet’s office.
• The cats’ routine was not disrupted. They got to continue to stay in their own space, even though their people were gone. When I got home, they were certainly quite happy to see us, but they also seemed very comfortable. I could tell they had been well taken care of.
• Accidents could happen on the way. On a looooong trip, more could go wrong. What if a cat got sick in a strange city or in the sticks? What if there was not a vet close by or if it was after-hours? You can plan ahead for such things by trying to be aware of where veterinarians are on your route, but it would still be very stressful. There is also the possibility that a cat could get loose or lost, even if you took the best of care to prevent that from happening.
• I actually got a break from cat care! I guess that I automatically do so much cat care daily that I forget how much time it takes out of my day. On the other end of this trip, with my husband and without my cats, it felt strange. I kept doing things like making sure that doors were closed or threads were picked up, etc., and then realizing that the cats weren’t there. That was a little disconcerting!

We had a lovely reunion when we got home, that was for sure. The cats made their happiness clear.

Have you ever been torn about whether to take your cats with you when you travel? What did you do about it? Tell us in the comments!

More by Catherine Holm:

• 6 Ways to Make It Easy for a Friend to Watch Your Cats
• Do Your Cats Know When You’re Leaving Town?
• 6 Ways I Get Comfortable With Leaving My Cats Before I Travel

Featured Image Credit: New Africa, Shutterstock

The post Should You Take Your Cat On Vacation Or Leave Them Home? Tips & FAQ by Catherine Holm appeared first on Catster. Copying over entire articles infringes on copyright laws. You may not be aware of it, but all of these articles were assigned, contracted and paid for, so they aren't considered public domain. However, we appreciate that you like the article and would love it if you continued sharing just the first paragraph of an article, then linking out to the rest of the piece on Catster.com.

To me, “mindfulness” means paying attention. The Oxford Dictionary defines mindfulness as “a mental state achieved by focusing one’s awareness on the present moment, while calmly acknowledging and accepting one’s feelings, thoughts, and bodily sensations.” I can certainly say that my cats remind me to stay in the present moment, all the time. Sometimes they force me to also slow down and actually pay attention to my thoughts.

We humans are creatures of habit and we tend to get complacent. We tend to take things for granted and we want things to stay the same. But, change is inevitable. Sometimes the rug gets ripped our from under our feet, so to speak, and we are re-reminded of whatever we need to be reminded of.

I had this happen recently. Several people in my life very suddenly lost their pets. Also, a story went viral about a rescued cat who received an outpouring of unconditional love in the short rest of his life. These things made me stand up and pay attention (a good thing). I made sure to love my cats and really love them, right in the moment.

Sometimes this is as simple as not just absently scratching Kieran’s head, but really getting all the other distractions out of my mind, focusing on Kieran completely, and really telling him that I love him. Rather than scratching his head while I think of a billion other things, I make myself appreciate his silky white fur. I scratch the funny spot on his back. I rub his soft ears, noticing that this makes us both feel good. I admire his long toes. (Kieran, a Turkish Van, has the long slim legs and toes of a swimmer.)

This is mindfulness, and my cats help get me there. They teach it on a daily basis. Here are the methods they use:

1. Body language

Zorro, my Ragdoll (or suspected Ragdoll; we can’t actually prove that he is purebred), is a master at using his body. Ragdolls are called floppy cats and Zorro is no exception. Does Zorro need me to get in the moment with him? He commences flopping, rolling, and waving his paws. I’ve never seen a cat indulge in such sheer love of using his body. If the flopping doesn’t get him my attention, he resorts to happy paw flexing. High fiving is another favorite activity. Anything to get my attention, and my mindfulness, now!

Zorro also loves being brushed. If you have a cat that adores this activity, it’s a great way to find yourself getting a lot more mindful. How can you not pay attention when engaged in this activity? I love brushing my cats (at least, I love brushing the ones who enjoy it). There’s something very relaxing about this activity that forces me to focus on the pleasure of it. My mind empties out, and that is a good thing.

2. Voice

Do you have a cat whose voice forces you to stop and pay attention to the moment? I don’t really have a cat like that now (although they can sure make a lot of noise if they try), but I did, once. My black cat Target was a real talker, and like Zorro and his waving paws, Target had a way of really grabbing you with his voice. He was going to connect, one way or another, and you better pay attention. We thought he had some Siamese in him.

Just days after he passed, we took a cross country road trip because we were grieving hard, and we couldn’t bear to be at home (it reminded us too much of this special cat). We were in a motel room one night and the (loud!) smoke alarm went off for no reason, and wouldn’t quit. Yep — we felt it could be Target, trying once again to get us to connect and pay attention.

Mindfulness is a great gift, and many philosophies or spiritual practices come at mindfulness in varying ways. Even though it can be annoying when you’re trying to do something, for example, and your cat is waving a paw in your face, we all know that these loved kitties might not be around forever. I try to keep remembering that learned mindfulness is a real gift of living life, one moment at a time. And our kitties can help us!

How do your cats help you be mindful? Tell us in the comments!

More by Catherine Holm:

• Does the World Welcome Cute Cat Stories More These Days?
• 6 Ways Humans Would Act If They Were More Like Cats
• Do Judgmental People Inhibit the Ultimate Goal of Cat Rescue?

The post How My Cats Teach Me Mindfulness, Every Day by Catherine Holm appeared first on Catster. Copying over entire articles infringes on copyright laws. You may not be aware of it, but all of these articles were assigned, contracted and paid for, so they aren't considered public domain. However, we appreciate that you like the article and would love it if you continued sharing just the first paragraph of an article, then linking out to the rest of the piece on Catster.com.